Last night as I put you to sleep in your new big girl bed ( with new hot pink polka dot sheets I might add) I realized that 3 years ago at that exact moment I still wasn't a mother.
My heart was so deeply yearning to be a mother to a sweet baby girl and 3 years ago last night my arms were empty. If I could have only looked into the future and seen what would happen the very next day on September 4th 2009 all my worries would have instantly disappeared.
Because you see my sweet Winte.r Fa.i.th, you completed me. You healed me and made me whole again. You filled a place in my heart that only you could fill and me made me a mother for the first time in my life.
There is nothing comparable to that moment. When every wish, every hop,e every heart ache disappears and by only an amazing miracle God made me, an infertile, empty wombed woman, a mother.
I remember seeing you for the first time, it all happened so fast, the nurses wheeled you from the nursery into this large open room where they did minor procedures on little babies and we had the room all to ourselves for the moment and they placed you in my arms and I have never been the same.
You are the most amazing child I have ever known.
Beautiful, caring, sassy and full of life.
You desire to be played with and doing something 24/7, you love your outside time and playing rough with your daddy and you love your brother immensely. You are the funniest little thing I have ever heard and you have this amazing interest in the world around you that makes me feel like a child again.
You are a mini me. Your mannerisms are exactly like mine and recently you seem to repeat the craziest of things that I say. For better for worse so this mama better start watching her mouth :)
What I think I love the absolute most about you Winter is how you love me. So incredibly unconditionally. On days when I feel as if I have failed you, rather big or small, you still love me. Your heart needs me and loves me in only a way a daughter can love her mother. You have learned how incredibly sensitive my heart is and you know exactly when my heart is overwhelmed with joy and about to cry because of it and you tell me " Mama don't cry, your happy!" You forgive me when I make mistakes and apologize as if nothing ever happened. You tell me " I forgive you mama" and just like that you move on. If we could all only love that way.
I love how your little mind and imagination is growing. You love to pretend and you love to play "mommy" and dress up with your baby and purse and you get this adorable little silly voice as you tell me that your the mommy and I'm the babysitter. I also adore how when I tell you something Tyson does, like laugh when I tickle his belly, you tell me " My baby laughs too when I tickle his belly".
And to be fully honest my love this new 3 year old you is quite a handful as well. We have created you into a rough and tough little thing and right now its backfiring a bit. You don't seem to understand when its to play rough and when we need to be gentle. You are so loud and love to scream not necessarily in anger but just in crazy excitement or heck most of the time just because you like to be loud. And of course you got lots of sass...Your a work in progress thats for sure but you know what sweet girl? We all are. And together day by day we will help you become the best you that you can be.
I hope you know as we do our best to shape you into becoming the woman God created you to be there will be ups and downs. Hard times and easier times, the good the bad and the ugly but through it all Winni know how incredibly deeply my heart loves you. And every single thing I do I am doing for your betterment.
3 years ago today my little love you gave me the greatest title I could ever be blessed with...Mama.
And I will forever ever ever love you with every ounce of who I am and make you proud that I am your Mama.
Happy Third Birthday Baby Girl!
My heart was so deeply yearning to be a mother to a sweet baby girl and 3 years ago last night my arms were empty. If I could have only looked into the future and seen what would happen the very next day on September 4th 2009 all my worries would have instantly disappeared.
Because you see my sweet Winte.r Fa.i.th, you completed me. You healed me and made me whole again. You filled a place in my heart that only you could fill and me made me a mother for the first time in my life.
There is nothing comparable to that moment. When every wish, every hop,e every heart ache disappears and by only an amazing miracle God made me, an infertile, empty wombed woman, a mother.
I remember seeing you for the first time, it all happened so fast, the nurses wheeled you from the nursery into this large open room where they did minor procedures on little babies and we had the room all to ourselves for the moment and they placed you in my arms and I have never been the same.
You are the most amazing child I have ever known.
Beautiful, caring, sassy and full of life.
You desire to be played with and doing something 24/7, you love your outside time and playing rough with your daddy and you love your brother immensely. You are the funniest little thing I have ever heard and you have this amazing interest in the world around you that makes me feel like a child again.
You are a mini me. Your mannerisms are exactly like mine and recently you seem to repeat the craziest of things that I say. For better for worse so this mama better start watching her mouth :)
What I think I love the absolute most about you Winter is how you love me. So incredibly unconditionally. On days when I feel as if I have failed you, rather big or small, you still love me. Your heart needs me and loves me in only a way a daughter can love her mother. You have learned how incredibly sensitive my heart is and you know exactly when my heart is overwhelmed with joy and about to cry because of it and you tell me " Mama don't cry, your happy!" You forgive me when I make mistakes and apologize as if nothing ever happened. You tell me " I forgive you mama" and just like that you move on. If we could all only love that way.
I love how your little mind and imagination is growing. You love to pretend and you love to play "mommy" and dress up with your baby and purse and you get this adorable little silly voice as you tell me that your the mommy and I'm the babysitter. I also adore how when I tell you something Tyson does, like laugh when I tickle his belly, you tell me " My baby laughs too when I tickle his belly".
And to be fully honest my love this new 3 year old you is quite a handful as well. We have created you into a rough and tough little thing and right now its backfiring a bit. You don't seem to understand when its to play rough and when we need to be gentle. You are so loud and love to scream not necessarily in anger but just in crazy excitement or heck most of the time just because you like to be loud. And of course you got lots of sass...Your a work in progress thats for sure but you know what sweet girl? We all are. And together day by day we will help you become the best you that you can be.
I hope you know as we do our best to shape you into becoming the woman God created you to be there will be ups and downs. Hard times and easier times, the good the bad and the ugly but through it all Winni know how incredibly deeply my heart loves you. And every single thing I do I am doing for your betterment.
3 years ago today my little love you gave me the greatest title I could ever be blessed with...Mama.
And I will forever ever ever love you with every ounce of who I am and make you proud that I am your Mama.
Happy Third Birthday Baby Girl!
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