I have been thinking a lot about a particular thing lately. Something that bothers me a lot about our situation out here.
Lately I have been thinking how outside of ONE person ( who I met last Monday at the mall) no one has reached out to me. As a mother, as a friend, as a woman, as a human being.
When I join new groups rather it be MOPS or Mom's Club or even just a group of women socializing at the mall I always make it abundantly clear that we recently relocated to the city and that its been a really hard adjustment for me. I reach out. I exchange emails, phone numbers and what not, but you know only ONE person has reached out to be a friend to me.
I've had someone say before how when you are the new one you really have to be active in pursuing friendships. How you have to be the aggressor( for lack of a better word) and while I am all about that and being forward, friendships eventually have to become a 2 way street.
One thing that breaks my heart really is the MOPS motto. " No Mom Alone" Really because I find it funny how week after week after week I can sit at a table with the same 7 women and still feel incredibly alone. Don't get me wrong every other Monday for 2 hours we're all " friends" and make nice but I hear from no one in between and there is no reaching out. So if the goal was " No Mom Alone" well I'm sorry to say MOPS you have failed miserably.
Thankfully God has sent me one amazing woman whom I recently met that I can call friend. I have blogged before about how with friendships you just know if its going to work out of not and while some of you may have disagreed with me I stand by that because as soon as I met Meghan I knew we would be friends. From day one ( which really was only like 9-10 days ago) our friendship has been a two way street of phone calls, text messages and plan making on both sides. I think she is wonderful, I think her son is wonderful, and I look forward to our Wednesday night pedicure and movie!
I only wish there were more people in this world like her. More people to reach out to a lonely girl who desperately needs just one person ( besides my husband) in this big ol' city to care about me, even if only a little bit.
Who can you reach out to today?
8 comments:
I am sorry no one has reached out girlie. I am constantly befriending people and always up for new friends. Hang in there <3
So well said! When I got married and moved 800 miles from home, I had a very hard time finding a friend. I had lots and lots of acquaintances, but no real friend. I'm sad to say that after 8 years, I still hadn't made one real friend. Being the new kid in town is very hard, and its even tougher breaking into a group of friends who's already established. Seems like very few people are in the market for a new bestie. So happy that you found one with Meghan! A true answer to prayer and hopefully it'll make your days in TX a little more bearable!
I wish I lived near you. :(
I will say my MOPS group is a little like yours. There are a few other mamas in my group that I email with and one invited Shelby to her daughter's bday party. But I will tell you which new people that I have met that have knocked me over with their friendliness...the ones I met through my church MOM2MOM bible study and the women's biblestudy. These women have invited me over for tea, have offered to help with Shelby while we move into the house, have came to pick Shelby and me up when I have needed a ride to biblestudy. There is just something extra special about women who walk with the Lord.
I am lifting you in prayer that friendships will be made through this time of transition for you. I know it can be quite lonely when you are the new person in town.
What a bummer. I am so sorry this is happening to you. And I get what you're saying, friendship should be a 2 way street. I am go glad though God has put Meghan in your life! I pray for more of those Moms to reach out - they should. We've all had times when we're lonely & just need a shoulder.
p.s. I wish I loved closer to you too!
Oh my goodness I feel your pain. We visited churches for months and in church after church, no one even talked to us. We've been in our church here now for over 6 months and still feel like everyone keeps to themselves. Just makes me wonder how many people are just going through life lonely because I know we aren't the only ones. And makes me want to make every effort possible to reach out to other people we meet, even if they don't reach back. So glad you have met one person you can be real with. It's amazing what an encouragement that can be!
I read this really encouraging post yesterday. Hope it encourages you too.
http://womenlivingwell-courtney.blogspot.com/2011/01/my-battles-with-loneliness.html
I am so sorry you are having a hard time with people reaching out. It's totally unreal to me how they could not want to be your friend. You are an amazing person and anyone who is your friend knows this :) Hang in there :) J
I'm sorry your MOPS table leader hasn't reached out to you. That's her job (speaking as a table leader myself). I'm in the same boat as you. I have people that I've met in our play group and in our Sunday School class, but none that I would truely call a close friend. It's sad b/c we've been here over a year, we've been active in our play group for 9 months and in our church for about 7 months. While I'm a table leader for our church's MOPS group, I don't feel like I belong yet. My only advice is to just keep praying. The Lord led you to Meghan, and I pray that He will lead you to more close friends.
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